That’s Right. You heard it. It’s True.

Coleman Steel Cooler – 54-qt.

Amazon List Price: $94.99

(not intended for use as a port-o-john)

Yes, my friends and I had a bit of an interesting experience at Brandon’s recent barn party, lovingly called Barnaroo 2003. Unfortunately sometime, someone in the night, decided to leave a present for someone in the cooler. Was it an accident? Was it intentional? There was a toilet not less than thirty feet away from the soiled cooler. It was uncalled for, it was absolutely over the line. So based on the success of this I am inspired to help Brandon get himself a new cooler.

I’d go into details but I’m afraid I’ve already said too much on the subject and already pissed too many people off. All I’m saying is that at all future parties, this is the new policy.